Nocturnal Admissions
by AhmoseInarus
Summary: Let Me In: 28 - Reid continues to recover from the events in "Cachorro" and "Edge of Insanity". The recovery steps are slow, and Hotch has to remind Reid that this is okay when Reid gets upset over their lack of intimacy. SLASH


Nocturnal Admissions

Ahmose Inarus

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds, nor do I make any money off of writing this story.

SLASH WARNING

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><p>This posting is in honor of the news that THOMAS GIBSON FINALLY HAS A CONTRACT! Next Season, we will have our ENTIRE TEAM BACK! THREE CHEERS FOR JJ, PRENTISS AND HOTCH!<p>

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><p>QUANTICO, VA<p>

12:47 AM

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><p>Hotch sighed and yawned, rubbing the corner of his eye and he finally, FINALLY, was on his way home. He had to stay late at work to finish paperwork after being delayed by a fucking last minute meeting. But now he was finally on his way home.<p>

He felt bad… Spencer had gone home hours ago. Dave, bless the man, had taken Reid home for Hotch. He turned onto their street, and smiled when he saw the dark hulk that was their house.

He paused to savor that.

_Their house_.

They had been there for not quite a week, and had been settling in just fine. It already felt like home.

And soon, Garcia would be bringing Apollo and Artemis, Reid's eight month old kittens, home to the new house. Reid was very excited to welcome them home… he'd had them ever since they were six weeks old.

Hotch reached the house and smiled again when he saw the dim lights on in the house. He pulled into the garage and closed it behind him, then slipped into the house. He de-activated the alarm, locked the door, and then re-armed the security system. He sighed. He had promised Reid a relaxing evening at home, curled up on the sofa together. Instead, Reid had an evening all alone. Hotch sighed and put down his briefcase and keys on the table in the hall, then headed across the living room and up the stairs to the Master Bedroom. When he reached the top of the stairs, he saw dim lights on in the sitting room. He pushed open the doors to the bedroom suite, closing them behind him. Before him were a pair of French doors leading out to the patio. To his right, was the arched doorway with two stairs leading into the actual bedroom itself.

It was here that Hotch headed. The side lamp was on in the bedroom. Hotch stood in the doorway and smiled down at his lover. Reid was sprawled across the bed, fast asleep. The sheet covered him from the waist down, and his left arm was draped over his belly, his right thrown across the bed. There was an open book by his fingers.

Soft lips were slightly parted as he breathed evenly, and his chestnut curls were splayed out across the pillow, framing his pale face.

Hotch slowly moved to sit on the edge of the bed and gently brushed his knuckles down his sleeping lover's cheek, smiling. Then he thumbed the ring that hung from the chain around Reid's neck. His smile widened. He slowly leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to the smooth cheek, then went to the bathroom to grab a shower.

When he got out, he paused as he dried himself off. He cocked his head, and listened.

… there. A whimper.

Hotch tossed his towel aside and hurried out into the bedroom to his lover's side. He closed Reid's book and set it on the bedside table before fully focusing on his lover. The boy's fingers twitched and he winced, a low moan slipping past his lips.

Hotch frowned. This would be Spencer's third nightmare in the week that they had lived in their new house. This WAS a big improvement, but in Hotch's opinion, the third nightmare was three too many. He reached out to wake Reid, but stopped when the boy gasped softly, rolling his head to the side and arching his back, letting his hands fall beside his head and curling his fingers into lightly clenched fists.

Hotch took in the boy's flushed face and the slight rolling motion of his hips… and then he took in the bed sheets that were tenting slightly. Slowly, the man smiled.

This was no nightmare…

Slowly, a smile crossed Hotch's face. He and Reid hadn't had sex in nearly five months. At least, not with each other, and on Reid's part, not consensual.

They had sex about a week before Reid had been abducted and spirited away to South America by Coronado to be his sex slave. Reid had been with Coronado for nearly a month. When the team got him back, he had lived, and recovered, with Hotch for nearly a month before the disaster in which he was sent to Willow Ridge. He was there for another month, and when they finally got him out, he spent a month and a half in outpatient recovery with the McBride Psychiatric Treatment Center. And now, he was home. Yes, according to Hotch's memory, it had been nearly five months since he and his Spencer had relations.

Honestly, Spencer sleeping naked in the same bed with the elder was such a big step, Hotch had been thrilled. But he couldn't deny that he was SERIOUSLY feeling some sexual withdrawals… especially as he stared at the beautiful porcelain skin of that soft, supple body. The body that he longed to hold close to his own. He closed his eyes and allowed memories of their most intimate moments flood through him.

He could feel the silken strands of hair between his fingers, the velvety soft lips parting beneath his own… he could taste the boy's mouth on his tongue, sweet coffee, hazelnut and something that was distinctly Reid. He could feel the soft skin of his neck and the vibrations as he purred under the elder's touch… the dusky nipples, hard and erect, the slightly concave stomach and the delicacy of his bone structure… long, slender, elegant…

The lion within Hotch's chest lifted its head, purring loudly as he roamed his eyes over his precious Gazelle. Slowly, he reached out and drew the sheets down.

His lips parted slightly and he let out a soft exhale; a slight moan of appreciation at what he uncovered.

"Nnnhhh…" Reid moaned, thrusting his hips up a bit, and Hotch felt his eyes roll back slightly as that sound sent spikes of pleasure straight into his groin. He slowly backed away into the corner, where he was hidden in the shadows.

"Mmh… Aar'n…" Reid murmured softly. "Ahhhnn…"

"Oh God…" Hotch gasped. "Spencer…" He looked up at another whimper, watching the thin chest rise and fall as the boy's breathing picked up.

"Spencer… baby…" Hotch called. "Let me hear you…"

"Nnmmm?" Came the precious inquisitive noise. Reid's fingers twitched again and his eyes fluttered before he fell still and sighed once more. Hotch smiled at that sound… that sweet, sweet sound. God, how he loved him. Hotch moved in closer.

"I love you, Spencer…" He murmured, and Reid sighed and arched his back, squirming slightly. "I love you…" He watched the boy unconsciously writhe on the bed, then spread his legs.

"Nnmn… yes…" Reid whimpered. Hotch slowly lowered his head, placing his lips right next to the boy's ear.

"Let me in, baby…" He breathed, inhaling the youth's scent. "Let me in."

"Ahhhhnnn…" Reid cried

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><p>This scene has been removed due to the recent crack down of the site admin who are deleting stories with explicit content<p>

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><p>Hotch washed his hand and cleaned himself up before moving out into the bedroom and sliding onto the bed.<p>

Reid opened his eyes and stared up at the man. Hotch stared right back, then slowly smiled. Reid smiled back, running his tongue over his lips, licking away a stray drop of his own semen. Hotch just used the damp towel in his hands to wipe away the rest of the mess from Reid's face, neck, chest and belly, then tossed the towel aside.

"I love you…" He murmured, leaning down and pressing his lips to Reid's. Reid let out a sigh of contentment, curling his arms around the elder's neck and parting his lips. Hotch slipped his tongue into Reid's mouth, groaning as he tasted his lover's essence.

They broke the kiss and Reid rested his hand on his lover's cheek. Hotch sighed and closed his eyes, pressing his forehead to Reid's. Reid smiled.

"… I'm sorry." He murmured.

"What?" Hotch asked, opening his eyes and sitting up. He was frowning.

"I'm so sorry…" Reid sighed, looking away.

"What for?" Hotch said, gently. But to his horror, Reid just closed his eyes. "Spencer? Oh, God, Spencer… No…" He reached out and swiped the pad of his thumb over Reid's cheek, brushing away the tear that had suddenly fallen. "Spencer… Oh, Spencer…" And he gathered the youth into his arms and held him close, whispering tender words into his ear, pledging his love and fidelity over and over again.

Reid wept quietly, clinging tightly to his elder lover, savoring the feel of the man's warm arms and the soft thrumming of his heart… slowly, the words faded and he just… FELT the man's love…

"You have nothing to be sorry for…" Hotch whispered after a while, softly rocking his lover.

"It's been months…" Reid gasped, closing his eyes tightly, fighting back another wave of tears. "I… I know that you… you have needs, and I haven't been able to… to meet them, and—"

"And I'll live." Hotch assured him, finally leaning back and staring Reid in the eyes. "I can handle it."

"Yeah… from across the room!" Reid blurted, sobbing out the last word and lowering his head.

"You went through a lot, Spencer." Hotch comforted. "I want you to worry about healing, not worrying about me."

"But… I love you." Reid whimpered. "And… I'm supposed to be there to… for you to…"

"For me to love, hold, take care of… to keep me company. And to make my life better and brighter and happier." Hotch said, firmly. "THAT is your role in this relationship. NOT the role that Coronado wanted you to fill." He spat the dead man's name with such venom, Reid was quite taken aback at first. Hotch smiled and lifted a hand, gently brushing back Reid's hair. "I am willing to take a lifelong vow of chastity if it means you will be healthy and happy… And never have to fear being touched again."

"But… I want you to touch me!" Reid cried. "I want to be yours, in every sense of the word!" He moved anxiously to sit on his knees before the elder man, laying his hands on the sides of Hotch's neck. "I want to have what we used to have… I want you to touch me… hold me… kiss me… make love to me… and I want to touch you… and please you… without dealing with… with this… this emotional bullshit!" Hotch blinked, startled at the word Reid had just used. Reid bowed his head, resting his forehead on Hotch's chest.

"Spencer…" Hotch sighed, staring down at the tousled chestnut curls and lifting a hand to run up and down the thin back, feeling each and every vertebrae under his fingertips. "Lie down, Spencer. Face down…" And he guided Reid into doing so, before reaching out for the lotion on the bedside table.

Ever since Reid had been rescued from Coronado, and then Willow Ridge, his therapist, Dr. Melinda Blair, had recommended therapeutic massage to relax her patient. Hotch was more than happy to oblige, as he found that giving Spencer his massage was a bonding experience for them both.

"Know this." Hotch said, rubbing the lotion between his hands to warm it up a bit. Then he began to rub it into Reid's back and shoulders. "You are my heart, Spencer. All I want is for you to be happy. You and I will be able to be intimate again… I have every faith in that. But you promise me that you will not try to push yourself for my sake. If you do, and something happens, I will never forgive myself… Remember that, and make sure that when you think you're ready, you really ARE ready… okay?"

"… Alright." Reid whispered softly, sighing in contentment as Hotch tenderly massaged his body from head to toe. When Hotch finished the massage he flicked out the light and lay down, drawing Reid into his arms.

Reid let out a soft, sleepy coo and cuddled into Hotch's chest, his eyelashes fluttering slightly.

"I love you, Spencer." Hotch whispered, stroking his lover's hair. "And… this is progress… You're letting me hold you."

"You make me feel safe."

"There's nothing between us… just you and me… our bodies…" Hotch continued. "you're not hiding behind your pajamas… you're readily enjoying this contact. And you allowed yourself to experience pleasure. You weren't afraid. You touched yourself… you enjoyed it. You weren't upset that I was there watching, or by watching me… THAT is progress." Hotch smiled and kissed Reid's bare shoulder.

"Be patient with yourself. Don't rush anything. Let things come as they come, as long as they feel right. We'll have our time. When the time is right. Now sleep. And don't worry on this anymore. Things will happen when it's time for them to happen. All you have to know is that I love you. And that's all that matters…"

Reid didn't respond. Hotch looked down, and smiled. His agent was asleep, a soft smile on his lips.

Hotch was only too happy to join him…

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><p>END<p>

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><p>Please review!<p>


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